Stumped...

This next section in Chapter Two has really stumped me.  What do I write?  How does it apply to me?  If you would have asked me 9-10 years ago, I would have told you there is no way I could be a stay at home mom.  I really enjoyed working and I do really like the work I do.  I surely didn't have anything against stay at home moms.  I just thought it wasn't my thing.

But then, once my son was born, I was torn.  I really wanted to be there to see all his firsts.  But cleaning all day would have been torture for me.  A few years ago, I read a book called "The New Eve."  And boy did it open my eyes.  I started seeing things differently.  Then I read The Good Wife's Guide for the first time a few months ago.  God is working on my heart big time!  But here's the thing.  Our family is in no way financially able for me to quit work.  I make more than my husband and yet, we are still struggling to keep up.  Could we have done things differently early on?  Oh, how I wish we had!!

So right now, and for a few years now, God has placed this desire in my heart to be a stay at home mom.  Yet, I don't see a way to do that just yet.  And did I mention, I really do love my job.  Yet this mother is torn between wanting to spend time with my kids and really loving to plug numbers all day (I'm a bookkeeper).

I looked up a few quotes from the book mentioned in Darlene's book, The Feminine Mystique.  And it was sad.  According to this book, women felt like housework and being housewives were drudgery and meaningless.  They questioned their existence, turning to alcoholism, divorce and worse.  But what if they had a more mature Christian woman encouraging them and pointing them to God and submitting to Him out of reverence?  Could it have changed their path?  I think so.

So this took my search to Titus 2 and back to our verse in Colossians a few days ago.

Titus 2:4-5 (in reference to older women instructing younger women)
Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

Colossians 3:23-24

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

So I am encouraged.  For now, I will take my current status and do the best I can.  I strive to stick to my values and morals at work so my love for Jesus shines through.  I have become bolder in my faith at work.  I am now able to share my faith and have meaningful discussions with co-workers who ask me questions.  God may be preparing me for other things in the future, but for now, I want Him to use me in this moment, at this time, where I am.  And hopefully I will continue to grow into the child Of God He desires me to be for future plans He has in store.

I will end with Darlene's last sentence in this section of the chapter.  "If you're seeking true joy with long-lasting results, it can only be found by building virtue upon faith.  That's where you'll find fulfillment, and that's where you'll find your true purpose in life."  Yes, that's my goal.