Chapter 14 - Final Thoughts

Before we move on to Chapter 15, I want to touch on the seven virtues a bit more.  Something has been weighing on my mind and it became more of a burden today.

We are talking about how we can be better wives (and moms).  We are learning how we can serve our husbands and family with an attitude of joy.  But I know we also want to be a living example to our families of God's love.  But are we doing the same for the rest of those around us on a daily basis?

I don't know if it's the result of social media or just being more aware of the night and day differences between a Christian and a non-believer, but my heart has really been burdened lately for the lost.  Most of those I know just don't want to hear what you have to say about God and salvation.  Today I see more and more closed-minded friends and family than ever before.

But what if....what if we really did stand out from the world?  What if our lives reflected these seven virtues on a daily basis?  What if we always stood firm in our beliefs whether it goes along with the popular opinion or not?  

1 Corinthians 15:58 NIV

Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

The world needs to see that we are different before they can believe in Jesus.  If we are so caught up in this world and have our fists full of the world, we just don't look any different.  We are not a light for Jesus.

Colossians 3:12-17 NIV

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.  Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Our children learn best by example.  They are watching our every move.  If we want them to grow up with a deep-rooted faith and trust in God, we have to model that for them.  The same goes for the world.  If we just say the Holy Spirit lives inside of us, but our actions, words and deeds don't reflect that, we are just a noisy gong.

I read on a Facebook post today some rather disheartening and misled thoughts from people so far removed from God - it broke my heart.  It just reinforces my desire to grow more in my relationship with God.  Think about the one person that you know that just exemplifies Christ and His love.  I bet you will say that person is full of joy no matter what.  For me, it's Mrs. Gale.  Just one look at her and you know she loves Jesus with all of her heart.  She has a magnetic joy that you just want to be a part of.  No matter her circumstances, she always has a glow - that beautiful light of Jesus shining through her.  I want to get to that.  Imagine if there were many, many more of us with that kind of glow.  The world would see it and they would want to know how we got it and how they could get it too.  Lord, let us lead by example - knowing your word, living your word,  being self-disciplined, bearing with one another and more.  Bind them all together with love and let us be a beacon of hope to a lost world.

Living in Unity - Chapter 12

"Perfect love is perfect self-forgetfulness.  Hence when there is love in a home, unselfishness is the law.  Each forgets self and lives for others.". J.R. Miller

Do you remember those first days of wedded bliss?  You both were so happy and in love.  Your love would stand the test of time and you wouldn't turn out like other couples.  And then reality set in...responsibilities, commitments, those annoying little habits.  The little disagreements turned into petty arguments.  And if you're not careful, those arguments get bigger and the blame game starts.

Darlene describes arguments as "our need to shine, our need to be right, our need to be heard."  That's a really good description, isn't it?  How many times do we keep on because we want to have the last word?

"But when sin entered the world, so did selfish ambition and pride.  There was no longer a passion to serve one another, but a knee jerk reaction to protecting one's self.  We hear the first account of this with Adam and Eve after they eat from the forbidden tree.  Both of them try to put the blame on anyone but themselves.

God's plan for marriage looks much different - "humility, tenderness, grace."  When we truly humble ourselves and value others higher than our self, we will focus on them and put our interests aside.  God wants us to do this in our marriages.

Philippians 2:2-4 NIV

Then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

Marriage has been so damaged and skewed by the world.  The world view is "I will stick with this marriage thing as long as MY needs are being met."  The world needs to see marriages functioning in God's design.  It needs to see the beauty of His way.  And it's up to His children - us - to provide good examples of unity in marriage.

Biblical Submission Continued

Submission - it's a tough thing for us to swallow, isn't it?  Our selfish, human side balks at the concept.  And the world would be happy to see the concept disappear.

How many times do we let our self take hold and question our husband's abilities and leadership?  "I" can do this better than him.  Why doesn't he listen to "my" way?  Life would be so much easier if he would just accept the fact that "I" am always right.  Oh how hard it is sometimes to silence that evil inner voice.

But God.  (Don't you think all good sentences start with those two words?)  But God has bigger and better plans for us.  And He planned it this way for a reason.  Even when those reasons don't make sense to us, His design will ultimately bring peace and unity to a household.

I found this definition of biblical submission on some class notes from a biblical word studies class on submission.  C. Michael Holloway in 1998 wrote after studying this word and its Greek origins "Biblical submission is the voluntary giving up of certain rights to another person (or group) so as to maintain necessary order."  Pretty insightful.

The Bible mentions submission many times in more ways than just being submissive to our husbands.  If we see it over and over again, I think God really wants us to grasp this act of submission.  Here are a few examples:

Submit to God - James 4:7

Wives submit to husband:  Ephesians 5:22-24, 1 Peter 3:1-2, Colossians 3:18

Submit to one another -  Ephesians 5:21

Submit to the leaders of the church - Hebrews 13:17

Submit to authority or government leaders - 1 Peter 2:13-15, Romans 13:1

Servants submit to masters  - Titus 2:9-10, 1 Peter 2:18

We can't deny it.  God emphasizes it over and over again.  So the world doesn't like it - why should we be quiet about it?  Darlene says it all when she wrote "I won't sugar coat or water down the commandments of God to tickle the ears of the weak.  Majority doesn't rule, and popularity doesn't hold the deciding vote."

So, how can we be a beacon of light to the world on this?  How can we model God's perfect plan to give the world a true, living and thriving example of biblical submission?  I want to hear what you have to say :)

Chapter Ten - "Biblical Submission Defined"

Our flesh will wrestle with scripture.  If we have such a hard time with certain things in the Bible, imagine how the world sees it.  Love your enemies, submit, deny self, serve others.  The world looks at these things and thinks it is impossible and unreal.  But we know the difference.  Everything in the Bible is God's divine word and the truth.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 AMP

Every Scripture is God-breathed (given by His inspiration) and profitable for instruction, for reproof  and  conviction of sin, for correction of error  and  discipline in obedience, [and] for training in righteousness (in holy living, in conformity to God’s will in thought, purpose, and action),  So that the man of God may be complete and proficient, well fitted and thoroughly equipped for every good work.

God calls us to do these things to please Him and to be a light in this dark world.  By doing these things, we become more Christ-like so the world will get a glimpse of God through our actions, attitude and demeanor.

I liked Darlene's take on this:  "Scripture isn't a candy bowl by which we pick and choose our favorite words hoping to satiate our palette. It’s a well-balanced diet of truth which is difficult to swallow at times, but nevertheless it brings nourishment to our soul."  

The Word of God is all truth.  We cannot pick the scriptures we like or twist His words to our advantage.  So when God tells us to submit over and over (remember that whole repetition thing we talked about a few days ago?), then we need to submit.

Philippians 2:3-4 NIV

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

Darlene included a quote from John Piper in this chapter that speaks volumes.  “Headship is the divine calling of a husband to take primary responsibility for Christ-like, servant leadership, protection and provision in the home.  Submission is the divine calling of a wife to honor and affirm her husband's leadership and help carry it through according to her gifts.”

Ultimately, when a husband becomes the head and the wife submits, the two complement each other and become a well-oiled machine of sorts.  They use their individual talents to help the other and both end up succeeding.  When we sincerely affirm and encourage our husbands, don't they have a bigger desire to lead and provide?  And when we have the provisions we need and our husbands our loving and protecting us, don't we feel more secure?  We have a desire to help our husbands and serve our family when we feel secure and appreciated.

Submitting to our husbands does not make us weak, a pushover or without a voice.  Instead "we're empowered by choice."  "Her ability to submit to good choice is the very thing that makes her strong."

Get That 'Tude in Check

"Everything we do should be for the glory of God, and so if you're cleaning for someone and you feel resentful, change your perspective on it." - The Good Wife's Guide

Colossians 3:23-24

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

So even tasks and chores that may seem repetitive or menial can be done as working for the Lord - for the glory of God.  And that my friends changes things, doesn't it?  I sure could use some reminders some days to serve joyfully in my day to day tasks.

That's why I love the last two pages of Chapter Seven.  Darlene gives us several scripture references to display in different rooms or by different work areas so we have constant reminders to do our tasks out of love and joy as working for the Lord.  If you haven't already, check them out.

How will you display these around your home?  Decal wall art, framed art or other creative way?  There are so many possibilities.  What other verses can you think of to add to the list?  It's also a great way to memorize scripture and hide God's word in your heart.