This next chapter discusses what we should do if our husbands are not meeting our expectations or are weak in their faith. First we will cover the freedom to choose.
God gave us all the freedom to choose. We have the same choice every day to "sin or serve." When God gave Adam the freedom to choose, he knew what the outcome would be. He knew the implications and yet He gave it to him anyway.
"If God grants us freedom to that extent, shouldn't we offer the same freedom to others? Choice is something we all get to make; whether it's the way one treats our bodies, what we use to feed our minds, the beliefs that fuel our faith, or the habits that mark our paths."
We can get our husbands to do the right things by pressure, nagging or whining. But does it really produce the kind of outcome that we really wanted? Darlene says the denial of the right to choose "produces a hostile response." I know pressuring my husband into doing something may get him to do it, but it usually happens with a bad attitude and ends up being done with less than 100% effort.
And that's when it comes back to looking more at ourselves and working on our own issues. When we focus on our walk with God and let go of the need to control and let God lead us - that's when good things start to happen. Oh, it's going to hurt and it's going to be tough to let God change your heart. He's going to point out your shortcomings. He's going to open your eyes and you will see how your faults affect not only you but others around you. But the great part is that He will change your heart and give you the strength and the means to do better in those areas.
And He will use you to lead by example. If we continually strive to do better and be better examples to our family and husbands, it's going to eventually bring about a desire in their hearts to want to do better. Darlene says this - "Put your words aside for a season, live your life the way you want others to live, walk in paths of righteousness and let your actions be his guide."
Just as our husbands have a choice, so do we. We can allow him to make his own choices about his actions or we can choose to control his actions with pressure. "The choice is yours - push and shove, or love and let go."
Proverbs 21:2-4 NIV
A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart. To do what is right and just is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice. Haughty eyes and a proud heart - the unplowed field of the wicked - produce sin.
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